Dr. Kristie Overstreet contributes to dating tips on the second date.
Article by Ali Drucker for Bumble.
Have you thought about what you should do on that second date? Do you ask the deeper questions or set back and see what happens? Get ready to improve your second date expertise.
Ask the questions
It’s okay to jump into those questions you’re thinking about. Feel free to go a little deeper with your second date questions, sexologist psychotherapist Dr. Kristie Overstreet explains maybe on date one you discussed what type of relationships you’re both looking for. Now, you might consider asking your date if they’ve ever wanted to live somewhere else, or what city they might want to settle down in. Conversations about life goals and plans may feel more natural on a second date, and can help determine if this is somebody you want to continue seeing or not.
It’s okay to get a little more vulnerable
Overstreet explains that on a first date, we often present the most polished versions of ourselves. And while there’s nothing wrong with that, by date two, you might want to start showing a bit more of your everyday self. Maybe that’s as simple as wearing a more casual outfit. It can also mean taking your filter off a bit; you can start by not breezing over a difference of opinion that comes up in conversation, and instead sharing your point of view and having a real discussion.
Opening that door can make you feel vulnerable, and if that’s the case for you, Overstreet advises a pep talk: “You have to tell yourself, ‘I’m just going to be me. And I would rather know sooner than later if they can’t handle me being 100 percent myself.'” Wouldn’t you want them to do the same for you? “You’re expecting them to be themselves and not try to act like somebody they’re not,” she says. “You owe it to them to do the same thing.”
The most exciting part of a second date is that you both liked each other enough the first time around that you made it to this point. Whatever you’re doing so far is working, so relax and enjoy it!
Read the full article at Bumble.
A clinical sexologist and psychotherapist. From sex/intimacy, personal growth, and relationships, I am here to help you every step of the way.