Let’s face it; we all compare ourselves to others. Whether it’s at work, in social settings, or our relationships, we compare ourselves to others. The problem comes when you compare yourself harshly, and it causes you to see yourself in a negative light.
I know your goal is to focus on self-change to get the life you desire. One way to do this is to make something you are already going to do like comparing yourself work for you versus work against you. Here are my tips on how to make it work in your favor.
You already know that comparing yourself to others is a normal part of life. You do it consciously and unconsciously daily. Yes, it’s going to happen, so decide to embrace it versus fight it all the time.
Accepting this normal part of yourself will help you put your energy into making it work for you versus against you. Yes, it’s reasonable to compare, since you are going to do it naturally, why not use it as a strength.
It can give you new ideas
One of the perks of comparing yourself to others is that it can give you a new idea or help you see things differently. What if you used comparison to generate a new outlook versus seeing yourself as not being enough.
You can get ideas from others about what you want more of or less of from your life. Use it for an idea generator versus a self-esteem destroyer. Remember, it’s your choice.
It can motivate you
What if the next time you compared yourself to someone, you used it to motivate you to be your best self. For example, you see another person and think that they have it all together. You compare yourself to them, and before you begin the negative self-talk, you say to yourself what do they have that I like.
See the other person as a motivator versus someone better than you. Sure, you want everything they have, but you have to work on it. Regardless if they did or not, so let go of any resistance that is holding you back. You decide if you will use comparison to help versus hurt you.
We all compare ourselves to others, but you can learn to channel it to help you versus push you into a shame spiral. Don’t give up too soon because self-change is hard work. However, the alternative is to stay stuck, miserable, and unfulfilled.
I hope you continue to push and challenge yourself through the changes you want to see in your life. Share a comment below about how you will use comparison going forward.
A clinical sexologist and psychotherapist. From sex/intimacy, personal growth, and relationships, I am here to help you every step of the way.