In my last post, I shared how to turn your New Year’s resolution into a lifestyle change. This week I want you to learn how to silence your self-doubt. Your self-doubt can debilitate you from accomplishing your goals.
You have worked hard to create your goals so don’t let your self-doubt bury them. To do this, you need to understand how self-doubt attacks you and how you can silence it for good.
Self-doubt is your inner critic. It is the negative narrative that tells you that you can’t do something or that you aren’t good enough. It can trick you into thinking it is real. Each person’s self-doubt looks different.
Ask yourself the following questions so that that you can better understand your specific self-doubt.
1. What words or phrases does my self-doubt use?
Think about your pattern of self-doubt and what words it uses.
- “I can’t do it.”
- “I shouldn’t waste my time trying.”
- “I never reach my goals.”
- “I will never accomplish this.”
- “I’ll never like what I see when I look in the mirror.”
2. What types of thoughts or events trigger your self-doubt?
For example, is it when you try something new or for the first time? Does your self-doubt get triggered when you make a mistake? Does it attack you when you aren’t feeling positive about yourself or the situation?
You have to know what your self-doubt looks and sounds like so that you can recognize it. You now have a better understanding of how your self-doubt surfaces and you are ready to silence it.
Show your self-doubt that you are in charge
Think about self-doubt on a scale of 0-10. Just like a knob turns from 0-10, your self-doubt can be silenced when it appears. When your self-doubt is the loudest, it is at a 10, and when it is quiet, it is at a 1.
When self-doubt gets triggered and begins to tell you all of the negative things about yourself, I want you to think of turning it down just as you would a knob. Depending on the situation, you may not be able to turn it to a 0, but you can dial it down a few levels. Do you see the power you have? Your ability to dial it down is in your hands. It may sound too simple, but it does work. Dial down the knob when your self-doubt appears.
Your self-doubt will be silenced
You are in control, not your self-doubt. Your inner critic is operated by you, no one else. Now you know what it looks like, when it gets triggered, and how you can actively silence it.
Remind yourself that you have beat self-doubt in the past. When was the last time you experienced self-doubt, and you overcame it? Think about your favorite mantra or quote that motivates you when you encounter self-doubt. Use it as a tool to help remind you that you are in control and more powerful than your self-doubt.
When are times in your life that self-doubt sneaks in? What helps you keep self-doubt at a minimum? Share them with me in the comment section below.
A clinical sexologist and psychotherapist. From sex/intimacy, personal growth, and relationships, I am here to help you every step of the way.